And Soon The Darkness (2010)

As dreary as 1970’s And Soon The Darkness’ may have been, one thing you cannot escape is the ability it has to haunt you. It’s a familiar tale of tourists on holiday becoming separated, one of which ends up falling foul of something unpleasant. As human beings missing person’s cases trouble us, so the movie did play heavily on the minds of anyone who saw it. Penned by the creator of the Professionals Brian Clemens, and the inventor of Doctor Who’s Daleks, Terry Nation. Despite its emotional draw, and its uncharacteristic edginess for a British movie of that time, the film felt incredibly hollow, lots of pacing about and lack of substance, so it seems that the movie was perfect for a remake.

Continuing their stream of remakes Anchor Bay Films recent movie takes the story from the French countryside (which back in 1970 seemed alien and a million miles away) to Argentina. The story follows Stephanie (Amber Heard) and Ellie (Odette Yustman) as American tourists preparing to end their cycling holiday in the country. Just one more night separates them from returning to normality, but a night on the town and a rather over enthusiastic Romeo causes them to oversleep and miss their connecting bus. After an argument between the two of them breaks out over sunbathing, Stephanie heads off leaving her friend in a remote location, but when Ellie fails to catch up Stephanie returns to where she last saw Ellie only to find she is gone. While the local police try to convince her that Ellie has just gone off with others for the day, Stephanie is adamant something has happened to Ellie, and the hundreds of missing person’s posters around the town do little to dispel her concerns.

This 2010 remake starts with a lot of promise, there is much more bonding between the two girls, the relationship far stronger than in the original. Add to this we have a much more adapted story, you’re allowed to like Ellie before she disappears, or not if you’re that way inclined. For at least half the movie this feels like a far better product, so much more finished than the original but sadly that is where the improvements end.

No sooner has Ellie disappeared and you can feel the weaknesses’ in the movie. One minute you have this cast iron strong storyline, the next you get all these loose ends that are never ever summed up. Elation turns to disappointment as the movie just continues down a darker path than the previous movie. Whole new plotlines are created but never explained, and as the movie draws to a close you have considerably more questions than answers.

Amber Heard does a reasonable job of keeping most of her clothes on for once, and as leading actress (and Executive Producer) she does a good job of making a like-able heroin, she literally fills the boots of the part she is portraying, and that in any movie is not always an easy task. Yustman also performs well, realistic in her behaviour, endearing as the movies principal victim. The final addition of the principal cast is Karl Urban who acts well, with a hollow character that is up until his final appearance in the movie, when acting school skills seem to have failed him. Indeed of all the cast there are no missing links, these are all good performers, and as a result the movies weaknesses’ certainly cannot land at the door of any of the performers. The direction is also very capable indeed.

No the fault is in the scripting, and that point alone; having not been privy to the original treatment for the 1970 movie, and to be fair not that enamoured by either film to hunt it out, I cannot tell you if either version of the movie is more to the authors vision. What I can say is that a reasonable attempt at correcting failure is dashed here, so many cliché additions, so many open scenarios just waiting for a story to fill them.

After the end of a lengthy action sequence you feel relived, relived that the story is over and that you can at last move on to something far more promising.

While a better version of the movie as a whole, the story still lacks much and on this basis I’d actually rate it lower than the original, because at least the original feature was consistent.

Trader Hornee

Back in 1931 Harry Carey starred as Aloysius “Trader” Horn in the movie Trader Horn, this epic African adventure (which later partially inspired the Indiana Jones movies) saw Horn encounter a group of African tribesmen ruled over by a white goddess; who just so happened to be an wealthy American heiress stranded there some years prior. Trader Horn went on to not just inspire the birth of one of modern cinemas greatest heroes, but also struck a chord with adult movie makers Jonathan Lucas and David P. Freidman, so much show that they created Trader Hornee a carbon copy of the movie, but with added humour and of course a little bit of sex.

 

Made in 1970, as an adult movie Trader Hornee (Hornee pronounced Horn the E’s are silent) is a really bizarre offering. For a sex comedy, and one made by adult filmmakers, there is very little “sex” to offend most people. Bridging a gap between the works of the late Russ Meyer and Laurel and Hardy, I’m sure you might already be able to form an image in your mind as to what this movie is like. Featuring Russ Meyers wobbly, disjointed, and often poorly cut filmmaking and the sort of slapstick comedy of Laurel and Hardy, Trader Hornee is an oddball movie that is difficult to compare to any other style I have ever seen.

 

You might well have an image of a mucky, dirty movie; but Trader Hornee is far from this, yes there is nudity, yes there is plenty of sexual reference but what there is little sex. The hero of the movie Hamilton Hornee (Buddy Pantasari) gets plenty of sex, but none you have to see. The movie is incredibly tame and not deserving of the reputation it has, despite being released uncut the movie looks no worse than any Carry On movie, in fact you might find more to offend in those. When it comes to sex the act is quickly breezed over, characters strip down to their underwear before flicking to another scene, upon return to the couple having sex the act is over and they are very much in relaxation time. Even language is tamed down, as soon as a swear word is incoming the actual word is replaced by the sound of a horn or whistle blowing.

 

Watching Trader Hornee I’m reminded of my youth, there is lots of cute stock footage of animals designed to create the impression that the cast and crew are in Africa. Whereas now in nature shows you see the harsh realities of two different breeds of animal meeting, often resulting in death; here you get the impression that all African animals get on like a house on fire, and as if to prove a point a piece of footage shows a chimpanzee and a tiger (both very young) playing happily together, the chimp slaps the tiger on the head before laughing at it. There are lots of lovely moments like this, shot on slightly grainy often orange tinged film stock, it really is delightful to watch, and for older movie lovers like myself it’s a wonderful look back at the past.

 

The term “Random” is one so often heard nowadays and is probably the best term I could ever think of to describe this movie. There are scores of scenes that literally look like they are just done for the hell of it. Often the picture shoots off into a red, purple, orange or blue lens; occasionally it shakes about like the cameraman is at a disco. When the African’s and a group of explorers led by Hornee first encounter each other they all start dancing together even though the explorers believe they are going to end up in the giant stock pot.  And when you think things have got odd enough, how about a man in a white monkey suit stealing gold which is actually a Nazi officer who loves gold.

 

I don’t really think it’s fair to comment on acting, because the movie is obviously all done in the name of fun, characters say things like “Leaping Lizards” with big cheesy grins on their faces, nothing is played straight in this movie. Worth pointing out though is the presence of John Alderman an actor who was once tipped to be the new Clark Gable, had it not been for his addiction with alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes often smoking as many as 100 cigarettes in one day. Instead the actor ended up in B-Movies, and exploitation pictures because of his difficult nature.

 

If you like to sit and watch what is effectively a bad movie, and have a really good laugh in the process then Trader Hornee is a very worthwhile movie to watch, you’ll laugh, and you’ll sit open jawed at the absolute ridiculousness of the whole thing.